Internet Famous

by Foot Pound Force

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1.
Cosmic 03:50
He has to get his homework done on time He has to kick the alcohol that is darkening his mind He’s blue and you assume that he is part of a rainbow Her name used to be his but now she’s trying to do it solo Cause Superman is not in this world Superman is not in this world, that’s DC I don’t need perfection I just need a human being to be there Cause every kind of evil is a threat to everyone everywhere Even little things can open up the Shadow King window So I pray to the One Above All to send me a hero Cause Superman is not in this world Superman is not in this world, that’s DC Kirby, draw the cosmic / Dream it up, Mister Lee Give me floating thrones in asteroid fields Give me hammers, give me shields Cause Superman is not in this world Superman is not in this world, that’s DC
2.
We are in it for the glory out in the sea of madness Putting out our stories hoping to find our way When will be the day where we’re big enough for roadies But those days are now long gone baby I am... Internet famous, but between you and me It don't come for free so won't you please donate to me, donate, donate to my Patreon In the age of self promotion you only sell yourself so well Setting things into motion only time will tell You gotta keep grinding following the muse The road is ever winding when you are... Internet famous, but between you and me It don't come for free so won't you please donate to me, donate, donate to my Patreon Well we're playing for the weekend being held down by the man With good pay and benefits but we really want the geekend It may be better behind a mask with all the mystery entailed Then you make your fans ask who is behind the detail Better stick to the branding and run through the checklist There’s no last band standing if you are... Internet famous, but between you and me It don't come for free so won't you please donate to me, donate, donate to my Patreon
3.
When I stepped into the light from the bail bondsmen place I had to get that feelin right, need something greasy in my face Well I was just about as low as I could get, I needed food and I needed it quick So I jumped into the bathroom of the nearest Krispy Kreme What did I see on the wall but a bacon machine Bacon machine dispense your meat to me Bacon god deliver some of your sweet fatty meat I need some bacon in my life, I've been eatin' healthy shit way too long If pork isn't right well I guess I’m wrong I see that big white box machine with instruction so clear and clean Outstretch your hands and here it comes Press the button and receive bacon Receive bacon receive bacon receive bacon I put out my hands and I wait patiently I pressed the button but still I do not see Sound rushes past my ear I've found a broken bacon machine I fear Bacon machine dispense your lard to go with my Krispy Kreme Bacon god deliver some of your sweet fatty meat Bacon god how do I please you Bacon god deliver some of your sweet fatty meat
4.
Let me tell you about a book I once read Brings back the evil that I thought was dead Bound in flesh and bone and human skin Should have found the professor’s desk and put it back in There I was in the cabin in the woods I opened the book and read a few lines I thought everything was good But I was staring at my demise CHORUS: I have to own every Bruce Campbell movie Cause I like the way he does things And I know that if evil ever comes near Bruce Campbell will save me Whoa, whoa, whoa... I was caught in a Bruce Campbell movie just the other day I said Klaatu Barada Necktie, I think that was the wrong thing to say Then a vortex opened, right before my eyes, I could see the end of my life Now I got skeletons chasing after me, I got no hope of escape I don’t know what Bruce would do in this movie, but I’m sure it’d be great (CHORUS) Plot device, plot device, oh plot device saves the day Dead by dawn, dead by dawn, oh dead by dawn, the deer head say Deus ex machina, Deus Ex Machina, Deus Ex Machina Save me Bruce Campbell, Save me Bruce Campbell, Save me Bruce Campbell (CHORUS)
5.
Stay 6 feet away from me Stay 2 yards away from me Stay 72 inches away from me Cause I want you to be safe and I love you Stay about a fathom away from me Stay 9 cubits away from me Stay 0.0011 miles away from me (3 6 repeating) Cause I want you to be safe and I love you If you laid a horse down on his side And he stood 18 hands or so high That’s the distance you gotta be If you want to come out of quarantine Stay 8 spans away from me Stay 1.82 peta-fermi away from me Stay 1.27 US Standard rail gauge away from me Cause I want you to be safe and I love you Stay about 6 lengths of fish away from me (entirely subjective) Stay one katana arm away from me (fully extended) Stay one wavelength at 146.52 megahertz away from me Cause I want you to be safe and I love you About 41 thousand poppyseeds About 16.6 milli-skeins 329 micro-leagues If you want to do social distancing Cause I want you to be safe and I love you Cause I want you to be safe and I love you Cause I want you to be safe and I love you

credits

released June 24, 2023

Foot Pound Force
The Internet Famous EP

1. Cosmic
WASB KB
KB - Backup vocals
PB Justin Miller
RA Five Points Recording
Copyright 2023

2. Internet Famous
WASB DH
KB - Backup vocals
PB Justin Miller
RA Five Points Recording
Copyright 2023

3. Bacon Machine
Written by Matt Barron
KB - Lead and backup vocals
PB KB
RA, like, BW's house
Copyright 2009, 2023

4. Bruce Campbell
Written by DH and Matt Barron
KB - Lead vocals
DH - Backup vocals
Kelly Marlett - Backup vocals
PB KB, Mike Lenox
Mastering by Mike Lenox
Copyright 2009, 2022, 2023

5. Social Distancing Shuffle
Written by KB, BW, and DH
KB - Lead Vocal
DH - Backup vocals
PB and Engineered by Mike Lenox
RA Studio L’Homme de Buologne
Copyright 2020, 2023

Front cover art: Brad Posey
Back cover art: Sean Farquhar and BOTF (Bathroom Of The Future)
Thanks to: Justin Miller, Mike Lenox, Kelly Marlett, The Cybertronic Spree, Billy Messina, and Clyde Gilbert

Acronym List
AD - Andrew Dubbel (Guitars)
BW - Brandon Whitworth (Drums)
DH - Dave Hewitt (Vocals, Bass)
EP - Extended Play
ICPS - Interim Cryogenic Propulsion Stage
KB - Ken Barnes (Vocals, Guitars)
PB - Produced by
RA - Recorded at
SRB - Solid Rocket Booster
WASB - Written and sung by

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Foot Pound Force Huntsville, Alabama

Foot Pound Force is a Nerd Rock band based in Huntsville Alabama.We're an alloy of Weezer and MC Front-a-lot, with 80% Geek, 15% Rock, and the remainder a mix of musical styles.We've been heat treated to a hardness of F'n Metal Rockwell

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